I find it hard to believe, that even though I’m pushing 57, the memory banks are completely full yet. This leads me to think that the lapses that I’m now discovering daily might actually be linked to the MS. Rather than there being no more room, I visualize my foggy brain unable to keep thoughts contained and the mesh of my cranium like a sieve, letting things seep out as deemed unnecessary.
Question to self: just what is the criteria to remaining “necessary”? Are there parameters for keeping one memory and letting another one ooze out? Case in point ~ I woke up from a dead sleep the other morning singing Peace Train by Cat Stevens, yet could not remember reading a super fun story with Elizabeth the week before. I mean Cat Stevens (now Yusuf Islam) recorded that song in 1971 and I’m pretty sure it’s been close to that long ago since I heard it. And Peace Train? Give me a break. Moonshadow probably would have made more sense. No, wait, it would not have. Brain ~ can we just let Cat Stevens go altogether, please?
It’s alarming to try to put my finger on a word or phrase to use in a sentence and have it just edging about the periphery. Sure, this happens to me too!, you’re thinking. But I don’t mean things like I read a “laudatory blurb about laudanum”. I”m talking about words like “required”, and “graham crackers”. Everyday, simple things.
The girl’s paternal grandmother suffered short term memory loss as she grew older. As she lived some distance away, they only saw her every few months. These short visits were always packed for her though, since every time the girls would leave the room and come back in she’d be super excited to see them again, like they’d been gone for ages. Elizabeth of course took full advantage of this, thereby deeming herself a genius in her Grandma’s eyes by correctly guessing that the Giants were probably going to smack one outta the park in the 9th for the win. Again.
Like most things related to MS, I find myself somewhat addled and vaguely amused by what is going on with my body and mind. I feel this kind of memory loss may come in handy for me when reading favorite books or watching favorite movies. If only I could remember what they were…